A Limerick a Day Keeps the Diet at Bay

Following our tradition of keeping everyone informed about important national days that may have been inadvertently overlooked, we discovered there are two this week that are probably the most important holidays of the year for those who enjoy gluttony and poetic wit, respectively. May 11th is National Eat What You Want Day and May 12th is National Limerick Day.

We thought we’d take a somewhat skewed look at what each of these holidays stand for and how they came about. So, working our way through the two chronologically……

National Eat What You Want Day was created by Thomas & Ruth Roy to help people break away from the frustrating health and diet trends of our times. To just let go and enjoy life a little, if only for one day. We think this is a great thing (and, speaking honestly, is a holiday we celebrate numerous days every week….).

In today’s tech/media-savvy world where people are focused on staying fit, getting a size zero figure, cutting carbs, yada yada yada, too many have forgotten to give importance to their taste buds and choice of food. So, this is a day to take a break and relish (pun intended) the food and treat your taste buds to a day of joy without feeling bad about it.

This holiday of gluttony seemed a good way to take a quick look at the history of dieting:

· In the beginning: Since cavemen left no written record, it’s impossible to tell exactly when the first cavewoman asked the first caveman, “Does this loincloth make my butt look big?”

· 400 BC: Ancient Greeks were way into fitness, spending hours a day at the gymnasium (usually naked). To stay fit, Hippocrates recommended a strict diet, exercise, and vomit.

· 600-1000 AD: Early Christians sometimes starved themselves to the point of hallucinating to be holy.

· 1066: William the Conqueror was so fat he couldn’t mount his horse, so he gave up food and only consumed alcohol. (The diet didn’t work)

· 1550: The world’s first diet book was written by an obese Italian, Luigi Cornaro. He recommended 12 ounces of food and 14 ounces of wine a day.

· 1727: Thomas Short thought that overweight people lived near swamps, so his “Avoiding Swamps Diet” recommended moving away from swamps.

· 1820: Lord Byron struggled to stay thin and often alternated between starving himself and binge eating. He invented a vinegar diet. (Don’t try this at home!).

· 1830: The first diet retreat was started by Sylvester Graham, inventor of the graham cracker. He preached vegetarianism.

· 1962: Weight Watchers is born in Queens, New York and Overeaters Anonymous was formed.

Unlike National Limerick Day (begun in 1984 to celebrate the birthday of English author and poet, Edward Lear) the origin of the limerick is unknown, but it’s believed that the name derives from the chorus of an 18th-century Irish soldiers’ song, “Will You Come Up To Limerick?”

A form of verse that’s usually humorous and frequently rude, the limerick is a rhyme scheme in which the first, second, and fifth lines rhyme, while the third and fourth lines are shorter and share a different rhyme:

·

The limerick packs laughs anatomical

Into space that is quite economical

But the good ones we’ve seen

So seldom are clean

And the clean ones so seldom are comical

·

Let’s be real, limericks are basically the drunk uncle of the poetry world. But having a drunk uncle who makes us laugh? No complaints! Since it’s all about the rhyme, the word “Nantucket” is held dear by many a limerist (not a real word, but it fits nicely here).

There once was a man from Nantucket

Who kept all his cash in a bucket

But his daughter, named Nan,

Ran away with a man

And, as for the bucket, Nantucket

It’s actually the “tucket” the makes it such a popularly used limerick word.

Pa followed the pair to Pawtucket,

The man and the girl with the bucket

And he said to the man

He was welcome to Nan

But as for the bucket, Pawtucket

·

In honor of the two holidays celebrated here today:

·

There once was a woman name Mimi

She never would wear a bikini

When she was asked why

She didn’t blink an eye

Said, “I’ve eaten too much linguini!”

·

Limericks can be educational, like this one to teach science:

An amoeba named Max and his brother

Were sharing a drink with each other

In the midst of their quaffing

They split themselves laughing

And each of them now is a mother

·

Or this one to teach math:

A dozen, a gross, and a score

Plus three times the square root of four

Divided by seven

Plus five times eleven

Is nine squared and not a bit more

And, without trying to dive too deeply into the bottom of our drunk uncle’s bottle, we leave you with these bits of….wisdom??

There once was a fellow O’Doole

Who found little red spots on his tool

His doctor, a cynic

Said “Get out of me clinic,”

“And wipe off that lipstick you fool!”

·

On a maiden, a man once begat

Bouncing triplets named Nat, Tat and Pat

Twas fun in the breeding

But hell in the feeding

She hadn’t a spare tit for Tat!

·

There was a young maid from Madras

Who had a magnificent ass

Not rounded and pink

As you probably think

It was gray, had long ears, and ate grass

·

There once was a fellow McSweeny

Who spilled some gin on his weenie

Just to be couth

He added vermouth

Then slipped his girlfriend a martini

Seems a good time to wrap up this weeks’ blog post.

While some may see National Eat Anything You Want Day and National Limerick Day as frivolous holidays, that’s exactly why we like them. They serve an important purpose – to remind us to let loose and have a little fun every now and then. So go ahead and write a silly poem, eat that second helping of cake. Because life’s too short to be serious all the time.

After all, we’re not here for a long time, we’re here for a good time!

What will you be eating on National Eat What You Want Day? And we want to hear your favorite, maybe self-written, limerick in the comments below.

#eatwhatyouwantday #limerickday #poetry #funny #holidays #food #diet #anyhigh