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Anyhigh’s Consumable Twelve Days of Christmas

We’re all pretty familiar with this Christmas carol in which the singer brags about all the cool stuff their “true love” gave to them over the course of 12 days of Christmas. Each verse builds on the previous one, serving as a really effective way of annoying family members on road trips.

No one, it seems, is completely certain where the song originated. The earliest known version first appeared in a 1780 children’s book called Mirth With-out Mischief.

Most historians agree that it was designed as a “memory and forfeits” game, where the singer would test their recall of the lyrics and had to award their opponents a “forfeit” – a kiss or favor of some kind – if they made a mistake.


The song that we’re all familiar with today was written by an English composer named Frederic Austin in 1909.

As a refresher:

Day 1: On the first day of Christmas,

My true love gave to me,

A partridge in a pear tree.

(at this point the song adds a gift for each day, building on the verse before it, until you’re reciting all 12 gifts together by the end)

Day 2: Two turtle doves

Day 3: Three French hens

Day 4: Four calling birds

Day 5: Five gold rings

Day 6: Six geese a-laying

Day 7: Seven swans a-swimming

Day 8: Eight maids a-milking

Day 9: Nine ladies dancing

Day 10: Ten lords a-leaping

Day 11: Eleven pipers piping

Day 12: Twelve drummers drumming


All the gifts seem to make sense, more or less. Assuming of course that the gift recipient is a true bird lover since they’ll have 23 of them by the end of it. And also assuming they had a very large house for, by the end of the 12 days, they would be caring for - and feeding - an additional 50 people. The one that always gave us pause, however, was the ten ‘lords a-leaping’.

I mean, who were these guys? A dance troupe fallen on hard times? Some Brits who were expelled from the House of Lords for jumping around and disrupting meetings all the time? It’s always been the main one we’ve had a hard time wrapping our mind around.


Dancing lords aside, we found a uniquely wonderful website that calculates the cost of each of the gifts in the song based on current market rates. It’s put out annually by PNC financial services group and is their Christmas Price Index. They’ve been putting it out since 1984 and the total for 2023 comes to $46,729! This is a 2.7% increase over 2022 (in 1984 the total came to just $12,623 which today wouldn’t even cover the cost of those damn lords a-leaping - $14,539). That assumes you gave just one of each gift. If you counted each mention of an item separately (that would be 364 gifts in all) then we’re talking an eye-watering $201,972!!


There have been countless versions of this song throughout the years. Some traditional and some, not so much. Here’s a few that we thought you might want to gather the family around and give a watch & listen to:


John Denver & The Muppets (This is about as traditional as we get)


Alan Sherman’s 12 Days of the Ultimate Santa Non-Wish List (Classic 1960’s comedy)


Daniel Ferguson’s 12 Days of Star Wars Christmas (May the force of the holidays be with you)


Bob & Doug McKenzie’s 12 Days of Canadian Christmas (Canadians, eh?)


Jeff Foxworthy’s 12 Days of Redneck Christmas (We reckon this one speaks for itself)


Destiny’s Child 8 Days of Christmas (Ya, we realize this one's only got 8 days, but you get Beyonce, so…)


Now, don’t get nervous because we here at AnyHigh.life are not going to sing for you in a video.


But, after all this talk about the 12 Days of Christmas, it wouldn’t make much sense if we didn’t give you our own take on the song.


With the holidays in full swing, festivities and get-togethers are kicking into high gear. And, in our humble opinion, no party is really complete without a few seasonal (or otherwise) drinks. Drinks meant to warm the body and soothe the soul. Which brings us to Anyhigh’s Consumable Twelve Days of Christmas.


The art of the holiday drink takes many forms around the world. Our 12-step gift to you today is a list we’ve put together of what we think might be some of the planet’s tastiest holiday tipples complete with ingredients and recipes. We’re pretty sure that, if you drink enough of these, you’ll find yourself in a pretty festive mood pretty quickly. We suggest starting with one on day one, two on day two, and by the twelfth day you’ll have twelve cocktails to work your way through. That’s assuming you last past day eight!


Day 1: On the first day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

A Pear Tree Martini



Day 2: On the second day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

Two Colada Morada’s


…and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 3: On the third day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

Three Dark Horses…

…two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 4: On the fourth day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

Four White Russians…


…three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 5: On the fifth day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

Five Hot Toddy’s…


…four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 6: On the sixth day of Christmas my bartender gave to me,

Six Glogg’s from Sweden….


…five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 7: On the seventh day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Seven Irish Coffee’s


…six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 8: On the eighth day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Eight Moscow Mules….


…seven Irish Coffee’s, six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 9: On the ninth day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Nine Whiskey Sours….


…eight Moscow Mules, seven Irish Coffee’s, six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 10: On the tenth day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Ten Cousin Eddie’s….


…nine Whiskey Sours, eight Moscow Mules, seven Irish Coffee’s, six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 11: On the eleventh day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Eleven Bombardino’s.


…ten Cousin Eddie’s, nine Whiskey Sours, eight Moscow Mules, seven Irish Coffee’s, six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini.


Day 12: On the twelfth day of Christmas, my bartender gave to me,

Twelve Tom & Jerry’s….


…eleven Bombardino’s, ten Cousin Eddie’s, nine Whiskey Sours, eight Moscow Mules, seven Irish Coffee’s, six Glogg’s from Sweden, five Hot Toddy’s, four White Russians, three Dark Horses, two Colada Morada’s, and a Pear Tree Martini!


As we wrap up this festive exploration into the 12 Days of Christmas, we can’t help but marvel at the absurdity and the charm of a song that’s been perplexing people for generations. Whether you’re pondering the questionable acrobatics of the ten lords a-leaping or calculating the modern-day price tag of the entire gift list, the song remains both a holiday staple and a delightful enigma. It’s a reminder that holiday traditions, much like those lords, can take unexpected leaps into the realm of the comically confusing.


And speaking of leaps, we’ve taken a leap of our own this week into the realm of holiday spirits – literally. Our journey through twelve days of cocktails is not just a list: it’s a liquid celebration, a spirited symphony for your taste buds and a “salud” to the holiday season. From the Pear Tree Martini on the first day to the cozy embrace of Twelve Tom & Jerry’s on the twelfth, we hope some of them were new to you and that each drink rings a festive note in the grand carol of your holiday imbibing. If you manage to make it through all twelve concoctions, consider yourself a true holiday mixologist, not to mention someone truly worthy of our admiration!


As we’ve raised our glasses, time and time again, we hope you appreciated the diverse interpretations of the classic song. Because these versions showcase that holiday cheer comes in many forms, each as unique as the individuals sharing their own version of it. So, whether you find yourself surrounded by dancing lords or holding on tight to your eighth Moscow Mule, here’s to a season filled with laughter, libations, and the chaos that makes the holidays so unforgettable.


May your days be merry, your cocktails be plentiful, and your ice cubes always be shining bright. We’ll see you in the new year. Cheers!


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joe.carrillo
Dec 22, 2023

Merry Christmas to all!


While the Muppets version of the Twelve Days of Christmas is a classic and can’t be ignored, the 12 Days of Star Wars Christmas was pretty darn good (although there were a few more great movies than just 4).


It’s not too late, you could record the Anyhighs Consumable Twelve Days of Christmas. It would be a special treat! Like someone giving you a Fruit Cake for Christmas! (Who in their right mind came up with such a horrible treat).


Anyway, for my money Seven Irish Coffees at the Buena Vista in San Francisco would be my favorite. Although I hear that SF is being over run by homeless people, I’d still go!


Merry Christmas and…

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